Shirley, Peenie, and Me

Peenie and I just learned that Shirley Temple passed away yesterday. Upon hearing the news, Peenie said, "Awwww. That's a piece of my childhood." Funny thing...cause even though Peanut's 66 years my senior, Shirley was a piece of my childhood, too.

It's amazing how many cultural things we share with those around us, regardless of age or relation. I remember watching Shirley Temple movies on television when I was growing up (there always seemed to be a marathon on sick days). Peenie remembers seeing her first Shirley Temple film at a movie theater in her hometown of Hardinsburg, Kentucky in the 1940's. "They were the only movies my mother would let us see...so wholesome...we loved them", she says.

That's probably why I loved those movies so much, too. Mom never had to monitor my watching them, and that's cause they really are so wholesome and "feel-good". Shirley Temple was just so darn cute! How could you not like her? But more than that...

I did some research on her a few minutes ago, and did you know that she was both the foreign ambassador to Ghana in 1974 and the foreign ambassador to Czechoslovakia in the 1980's? She was also the first celebrity to hold a press conference IN THE HOSPITAL discussing her struggle with breast cancer immediately after having a mastectomy in 1972. These, along with other achievements, make her a pretty interesting lady. She didn't let her life stop at being a child star. She made her mark in many different arenas. Pretty inspiring, if you ask me. And speaking of different arenas...

I'm moving to Charlotte! I've just accepted a job as the Assistant Director of Stewardship (aka: Fundraising) at Myers Park Presbyterian Church. My start date is at the end of the month. I'm excited to be working with such a respected organization, and to explore a new city! Plus, I get to live with one of my very best friends, Miss Sarah Tomkinson. Warm fuzzies all around!

This means some change for Peenie, of course. And friends, your prayers are needed. Peenie is determined to stay in her home...alone. We've come at her from every single angle to convince her not to...but she's not wavering. And until she is unable to care for herself, our family has decided to let her make her own decisions.

This worries me very much, and I even contemplated not taking this new job in order to stay in Greenville with her. But, as I am falling deeper into debt with my blasted student loans and monthly bills, my family is convinced that moving is the best decision for me...and possibly for Peenie. By moving out, we're hoping to "freeze her out" (current weather pun intended). As sad as this sounds, we're hoping that the loneliness she experiences once I am gone will help sway her to sell her home and move into a better environment (ie: most likely my mom and dad's home in Greensboro).

So please pray, friends! Pray that Peanut will be able to let go of her house and her stuff, so that she can be surrounded by family who can care for her in her final years. Seriously, your prayers are COVETED in this situation.

As far as today goes, though--Peanut and I are snowed in! So we're going to spend one of our last Tuesdays together watching the flakes fall, enjoying some homemade walnut brownies, drinking coffee, and maybe watching a Shirley Temple movie or two!

I'll leave you with this:

Happy Valentine's Day from Katy and Peenie!

Personalize funny videos and birthday eCards at JibJab!

You Can't Push the Lord Around

I believe in Providence. I also believe in free will. Where those two overlap, I'm not quite sure. But Peenie said it best earlier today:

"You can't push the Lord around. I'd like to, but it's best not to do that."

Wise words from my grandmother. And maybe she's rubbing off on me, because...

I read an article recently that was entitled, "Life Doesn't Begin at Your Next Milestone". True, and while I think we all know this, we act like we don't. Why do we push, push, push SO HARD to get to that next milestone? Be it college, grad school, a job, marriage, a baby, grandbabies (Ahem! Mom? Stooooop!)...is it society that drive us? Family? Friends? Our own entitlement? I think comparison has a large part in it, and you know what I read about comparison recently? It's the thief of joy.

Let THAT sink in for a minute.

But yes, my usual M.O. for any milestone (or any big decision, for that matter) is to PUSH. Just ask my family. My personality is all like, "ADVANCE! ADVANCE! NEVER RETREAT!" For all of you Myers Briggs people out there, I'm a total ENFJ, and that F is a capital F with an exponent of 20. If something feels right, I jump on it like white on rice. Like cold on ice. I don't pray about decisions. I don't wait for things patiently. I MAKE things happen. 

My family laughs at this ability of mine, mostly because it's helped me get a lot of the things that I've wanted. I'm a "go-getter", which to most people is a good thing. But the one thing you don't hear about go-getters is that while they're dependable and get things done, they typically do not reflect on things. And lack of reflection can result in premature decisions. Hence, my 1st and 2nd attempts at graduate school, my split-second move to DC in 2012, my inability to figure out what I want to DOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Etcetera, etcetera, and so forth. So where am I going with all of this? Or...where am I going, period?

Well, as far as what I want to do for a career is concerned, you've got me there. I know I like to work with people. I know I don't want to be in a cubicle again. I know that I'm creative, yet also structured. And I know that I want to do something meaningful. Something that furthers a cause, not something that just shoots me a paycheck.

As far as decisions or milestones go, the next one for me is having a salaried job once again. Peenie no longer needs me in Greenville, so it's back to LinkedIn job search. But I'm not pushing this time. Nope, I'm approaching it differently. 

First, this milestone is most definitely a "need" and not a "want". The time that I've spent in Greenville with Peenie has been good for me in many ways (forced reflection being one of them), but it has not been good for my finances. This needs to be righted ASAP. Student loans, you dig?

Second, in the past, my tendency has been to go out and grab whatever decent-sounding job I could get. No more. This will be a process where I will practice patience and reflection. I will put myself out there and be "choosy". I will not settle.

Third, though I ultimately will choose where to work (God bless the USA for that), I am relying on the Lord to place me in the job and city that is best. This is where Providence and free will intersect, I think. 

So, friends, keep me in your prayers! Pray that I'll find some meaningful employment! And that the Lord will bless it! And if you're struggling with reaching that next milestone yourself (whatever it may be), remember the wise words of Peanut:

"You can't push the Lord around. I'd like to, but it's best not to do that."

Peenie Ain't Happy

Hello, friends! It's been awhile!

Sorry, not sorry I've been blog-slacking during the holidays--it was so nice to be home and have NO obligations for a bit. Thanks, Mom! You are my favorite! And you're a really excellent cook, and a really good gifter, and a really swell pedicure buddy, and your hugs are really great, and...so much more. I love you! Thank you for being on Peenie Patrol AND for finding time to hang with me, too. You made my Christmas Break a true break! I owe you big time. Xoxoxo!

So, friends, as you've probably gathered, Peenie DID get in the car with me on Christmas Eve morning, and we made it to Greensboro a few hours later. Funnily enough, the moment we climbed into the car and I started the engine, the Hallelujah Chorus burst forth from my stereo speakers. Coincidence? I think not.

We stopped in Salisbury for lunch with James at Gritz Cafe (highly recommend), where Peenie flirted with him for the duration of our eating. Hehehehe...don't think I got a word in edgewise! It was the first time that James had been exposed to Peenie for more than five minutes, and his summation was hilarious: "She...is a live wire!" You're so right, my man. So right. Or, as Aunt Jayne says, "A live wire of disquiet." That's Peenie for ya!

Since mom was on Peenie Patrol, I don't have many Christmas Break Peenie stories. But I do want to share a hilarious nickname that she's christened me with: Twisty Butt.

Yep. You read that correctly. Twisty Butt. My 92 year-old grandmother now calls me Twisty Butt.

The morning that we left for Greensboro, I was running up and down the staircase at Peenie's, towing her luggage to the car. Friends, in case you were wondering, the woman can PACK. And not lightly, either. Sheesh. Anyway, as she was watching me go up and down the stairs, she says, "Katy, you got a little twisty butt. Bet James likes that a LOT!"

Awkward...

But now Peenie and I have made it into a dance! The Twisty Butt! Want to learn? Just twist your rumpus to any song you like, and you're doing it correctly. We taught it to Will, Mitch, Mom, and Dad. I'm sure it'll be the next dance wave in no time. YouTube, here we come!

I'll leave you with this:

Peenie knows about the blog. She's actually known about it for a while, but over break, there were many relatives that told her that they just LOVE reading about her on my blog. Needless to say, she AIN'T happy. And she wants me to "stop this blog foolishness" ASAP.

...well, I'm not. Hehehe! Just do me a favor, friends! If you see her, PLEASE don't mention the blog. I'm afraid she's going to gag me in my sleep! Just kidding. But really.

Next blog post? I'm going to attempt a video interview with Peenie about her feelings toward the blog. Stay tuned!

And, HAPPY 2014!

On the Hunt Again...

Hello, friends!

Hope everyone is getting in the holiday spirit! Peenie and I have had quite the exciting week, with two new additions to our families--CHRISTMAS BABIES! One to the Purgason family, and one to the Edwards family! That makes Peenie a GREAT GRANDMOTHER, and I guess that makes me an...aunt-in-law? Cousin-in-law? 2nd cousin? What are you if your cousin has a baby? Anyway...

William Matthew Dillion (my cousin Carrie Purgason's baby boy) was born on the 17th. He's a big boy! 8 pounds, 3 ounces.

Adair Lee Yates (my cousin Nell Yates' baby girl) was born on the 18th. She's a little one--born a whole month early! 6 pounds, I believe.

Both babies and mothers are healthy and happy. So fun! Can't wait to meet little William in Greensboro on Christmas Day. Don't know when we'll meet little Adair...she's a California baby! But we hope to meet her soon, right Peenie? (Peenie squeals in delight at the thought!)

Alright, so even in the midst of all this activity, I am "on the hunt" again. The DREADED job hunt. This is where I need your help, friends.

We learned last week from the doctor that Peenie's congestive heart failure will most likely get worse in the next six months or so. Of course, there's no telling what will happen--she could be kickin' till she's 110! Heck, she could outlive me--and I wouldn't put it past her! But we're beginning to prepare for what COULD happen. Mom has begun to get the house ready for sale, we're looking for care options for Peenie, and I've begun fishing for prospective job opportunities in Greensboro and Winston-Salem.

I'm looking for something in the nonprofit world, something administrative, or something marketing-related. Any magazines hiring? I DO like to write! Shocker, huh? Hehe. Benefits would be lovely! Start date in the Spring or Summer.

Will you keep your eyes peeled for me, friends? I can shoot you my resume to forward along, and I can provide excellent references! 'Twould be much appreciated.

I'll leave you with this:

Entertaining tidbit of the week...

Peanut found two unrecognizable tubes of lipstick in her purse this week. NOT of the Orange Flip variety. Of the pink variety. WHERE DID THEY COME FROM? They're not mine. They're obviously not Peenie's. Did she accidentally pick them up at a restaurant somewhere? Did she unknowingly (gasp) SHOPLIFT them? It's driving Peanut nuts. She's driving ME nuts. We've re-traced her steps, trying to pinpoint the location where she came to possess the mystery lipstick tubes. So far, no luck. I'm thinking about swiping them out of her purse and trashing them--just so she'll forget about it! Poor little nut. Her (did I shoplift?!) conscience just won't let her drop it.

Peenie, Please Go to Bed

It is now almost 8:10 pm, and Peenie has not stopped talking since 8:00 this morning. Granted, I was at work for a portion of the day, so I had a few hours break...but when I got back, I saw that the yapping had continued. It continues even now, as I type.

"Katy, what are you doing?"
"Katy, how do you spell laughter?"
"Katy, doesn't that news-anchorwoman's hair look just TERRIBLE? I wonder when she last washed it."
"Katy, where's my cell?"
"Katy, can you go downstairs and get me a roll of paper towels?"
"Katy, I can't believe that poinsettia was only eight dollars!"
"Katy, what's that spot on the wall behind you?"
"Katy, what color is your hair?"

(Just so you know, I have patiently answered every question she has asked me today. Even the four questions she asked earlier as I was crossing two lanes of heavy traffic.)

Right now, what I really want to say (but won't) is, "Peenie, please go to bed."

I feel like Louis Griffin with Stewie right next to me going, "Mom? Mom? Mom? Mom? Mommy? Mom-ee? Mom-aa? Mom-ee? Mother? Moooooom? Mom?" And...I'm tired. I just want a little bit of quiet. I wish Peenie would be quiet.

Ok, she just went to bed.

Whew! All you moms out there--I feel for ya.

Oh, and...now she's back.

You know how little kids boomerang when it's bedtime? You send them to bed, and then less than a minute later they're back asking for a glass of water or some silly question like:


"Katy, where should we go to lunch tomorrow?"

"I don't know, Peenie...maybe we should decide that tomorrow."

"Okay! Sleepy tight! Love youuuuuuuuuu!"

"Love you, little nut."


Just like a little kid, Peenie boomerangs...but she's too cute to be annoyed at for too long. And, you can't exactly put your grandmother in time-out, can you?

I'll leave you with this:

(Peenie, looking at the news-anchorwoman's hair.)

Peenie: Her hair is really brassiere.
Katy: Peenie, don't you mean bizarre?
Peenie: Oh. Yea. That's right. Her hair is bizarre...BUT...she's probably wearing a brassiere!
Katy: On national television, I certainly hope so.
Peenie: Hehe!

Getting to the Bottom of Hurt

Have any of you seen the movie "Lars and the Real Girl"? I watched it last night on Netflix, and was really glad I did. Before you Google it, let me provide you with a description, for fear of you thinking the worst. Trust me, it's not as bad as it sounds! In fact, it's not bad at all. It's a really thought-provoking movie.

"Lars and the Real Girl" is about a guy named Lars (played by Ryan Gosling) who is lonely (though somewhat by choice), extremely socially awkward, but very sweet. He lives in a garage apartment, just a few steps away from his brother's home. His brother has a wife who is newly pregnant, and she regularly reaches out to Lars to join them for meals. Lars almost always refuses. She worries. The brother shrugs it off and tells her not to fret--that Lars is fine and that he's always been a little strange.

One day, Lars, out of his loneliness, orders a life-sized doll off the internet as a companion. The doll, whom he names Bianca, is actually a sex-toy, which everyone else seems to notice but Lars. Lars suffers from a delusion that Bianca is actually a real person, and he begins a (non-sexual) relationship with her.

The brother and wife are, of course, in shock. Out of fear/concern, they convince Lars that Bianca may need a "check up" at the doctor's (who also happens to be a psychiatrist). At the doctor's (played by Patricia Clarkson), they are first told of his delusional state. When they ask what can be done, the doctor tells them that they must go along with it (much to their embarrassment) until they can find out what part of Lars or his memory the delusion is coming from. The doctor agrees to talk to Lars every week during Bianca's "check ups", to see if she can help get to the heart of the matter.

This is where it gets interesting. The brother and wife ask for help from their community and church. Together, they all accept Bianca and treat her as a real person for Lars' sake, ultimately getting to the bottom of his hurt, and leading to his healing.

Wow, right?

The message of the movie--getting to the bottom of fear and hurt through LOVE and CARE--hit me like a ton of bricks. It's something we all need to learn, and man, am I preaching to the choir when I say that.

As I've said before, living with Peenie is fun, but it also can be tough. Very tough. This week, especially. After we got back from the hospital last Saturday, I spent the next two days battling her on taking her medication. Peenie was resistant, insisting that there was nothing wrong with her. I kept insisting that there was. Out of fear for her health, I began to take on a forceful and patronizing tone. This obviously made things worse, and the little nut continued her revolt until we both exploded.

On Sunday night, I realized that I needed to change my approach. Instead of treating her like an unruly child, I needed to be more loving and more patient. Who wants to take orders or receive help from someone who's forceful, anyway?

It's now Friday, and we're in a completely different place now. Because of this different approach, we've had a great week! Talk about a turn-around! Peenie is taking all of her meds, we've both been in contact with her doctor, and she's actually LET me help her with some things that she normally wouldn't.

Peenie and I were both afraid when we got home from the hospital, and Peenie was hurting from embarrassment and the realization of her age and condition. I initially took the wrong approach with forceful words on the importance of her medication, but now I know that was wrong of me. I need to remember that in this relationship (and in all relationships) it's best to get to the bottom of fear and hurt through love and care.

I'll leave you with this:

A picture of Peenie during her check-up at Dr. G's! Cutest patient ever, right?

I Could Make a Living on Peenie Quotes

These quotes might possibly be the funniest things I've heard yet from Peenie. And they all happened within the last 15 minutes. Could possibly be all of the new meds she's on, but still...I could resign from blogging after these:


Mom: Mother, I don't even remember how many boyfriends I had.

Peenie: How many rocks are on the seashore?

---

Mom: Remember when JD asked me if I'd have his punkards?

Peenie: He was a big guy. Probably had a big punker.
---
Peenie: Sue, I wish you'd just leave Ed. Come down here and live with me.


I'll leave you with this:

...and, I quit (for now). Partly cause I'm still doubled-over and can barely type. Wouldn't Flannery O'Connor have a hay-day?